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Thoughts from the fair  

Posted by Ryan Woods

I visited the Clark County Fair this week with wife, child, and in-laws. Good times were had by all. Here are some random thoughts and/or observations from that little excursion:

  1. Whats up with psychics? This little old lady with no teeth was like "You wants a know yer footure?" Her station consisted of an old blue tarp turned into walls, and old ratty card table and a box fan. It got me thinking about how all the palm readers, tarrot card peoples, etc seem to always be located in the ghetto. Whats up with that? Lets work through the logic here: we (speaking on behalf of the psychics) have supernatural special powers, we know the future, we make money off our amazing knowledge of the future, we can't afford respectable places in town, we can't afford a table cloth for our card table, we need to sell futures for more money! I mean, if they really knew the future wouldn't it make sense that they would bet the horses more often and all be millionaires? I wonder if in the order of psychics ('cause there must be an "order") there are rules that say that you cannot use your abilities for your own gain. Rather you are required to sell your services at minimum price to those of only stout and upright heart. I guess we'll never know.
  2. I miss the bus. I rode the bus from the fair to the mall where I had to go to work. There was only four of us on it which seemed pretty pathetic for a bus ride, but it was enjoyable none the less. In Portugal to get anywhere I had to take a bus ride. Anywhere. I loved it. On the bus I can read, I can sleep, I can talk to people, it's complete driving freedom. Not to mention it's good for the environment, for my gas bill, and for traffic problems. Here's the rub, though, Vancouvers bus system is...well...just ok. I wish I could ride the bus here. Maybe I'll find a way. I miss the bus.
  3. I could care less about Carnies (spelling?). They do their job, I make them money, they creep us all out, and thats the way it goes. But the people at the fair who really get me are the exhibit people. You know, Cutco knives, Miracle Blades, Equity Reality, etc. They've all got their wheels where you can spin 'em and win major prizes. They all want your info so you can enter into a drawing for free vinyl siding. They all want to share their amazing product with you, they want to wheel and deal ya, they want to make money. Here's the thing, I walk down those isles trying not to make eye contact 'cause I feel so incredibility sad for those people. Maybe sad is a bad word, maybe embarrassed is a better one. I'm embarrassed for them when I reject them right to their face. And so, to save them from their shame I take a free pamphlet about how I'm going to hell. I even pretend like I'm interested in buying a home just so that they can get excited and give me a free mug and pen (I don't want their mug, I just want them to feel like they're not rejects). I spend the entire time trying to save those people face! And they don't even give a care (remember that expression?)!
  4. I alluded to it on #3, but whats up with all the booths offering grace? Seriously, every single Jesus booth that I found was not about grace but about the fact that I should be scared about going to hell (of which they inform me that I am). What if a church group had a booth where we promoted an opportunity to help people? Ohh, or what if we had a station where we gave people back rubs. People would be like "what are you selling?" and we'd say "nothing". "Oh, then why are you giving people back rubs?" "because you looked worn out from walking and being in the sun." "and so you just set up a booth to give backrubs?" "Pretty much. I'm a Christian who goes to Renovatus and we were wondering what we could do to be nice to people while they were at the fair. We thought back rubs might make you feel better." "huh, pretty cool" "You do realize that you're going to hell right?" "what?" "I'm just kidding...but it's true...do you want to get baptized over at the goat pavilion?"

9 additions to the conversation

"I'm just kidding, but it's true." I think that would work.

I miss riding the bus too. And by "bus", I mean "tram and U-bahn". I wish we could master the art of public transportation here in the good ol' U S of A. The MAX gets close, but is still not as workable.

And the max does me no good in the Couve!

ryan i dont think you can knock the booth vendor peoples games, considering you won your very own bowling ball from them! show a little gratitude. what about the guys that give free water, thats kinda like the free backrubs...i always get the free water...its so icy fresh and they shoot it out ofthe sprayer things, like its beer. mmm beer.

remember when you guys would come visit me in the goat barn? those were good times. i would be wearing my boots and wranglers, and id be sweeping goat poop and alfalfa off the floor. Were you looking to be baptized? Cause I totally would have done it if you'd asked.

huh... good days at Clark County Fair.

lisa, dont be crazy, boys cant baptize girls!
anyhoo, those were some good times...you were so hot in those red stonewashed wranglers....remember my blue airbrushed cowboy hat with the big blue feather on it? i was equaly as hot...

#4 is just what i've needed. I laughed my picky jelly bean eatting butt right off (i am eatting them right now. that is why it comes up here).

Great post Ry! We just might want to think about your idea.
And thanks for for giving the goat barn a hiddy ho :)

I'm not sympathetic to the vendors. I take 'em for all they're worth! Pens, water, magnets, pencils, stickers, ballons, bumper stickers, anything they got! I think I won something one time!

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I am uncertain what to call myself, but my family and I are committed to the people of downtown Vancouver, WA. We are followers of Christ and hope to be a part of a movement of hope, imagination, and transformation in our developing downtown community.

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